Building Connections with People

Advice from some leading experts on how to build better connections with people.


Building Rapport with People

Key Tips

  • People like people like themselves OR someone they want to be like
  • Words account for only 7% of communication skills – need to use the 93% other communication skills to build rapport
  • Style is more important than substance initially
  • Matching & Mirroring: most effective way of building rapport
    • Voice: Tone, volume & speed
    • Terminology: same words, terminology
    • Body: posture, gestures, facial expressions, proximity, touch
    • Breath: breathing at the same pace

How to Speak so People want to Listen

7 Deadly Sins of Speaking

  • 7 Deadly sins of speaking: Gossiping, Judging, Negativity, Complaining, Excuses, Exaggeration, Dogmatism
  • HAIL: Honesty, Authenticity, Integrity, Love
  • Vocal toolbox: Register (depth of voice), Timbre (how it sounds), Prosody (not being monotone), Pace, Silence, Pitch, Volume

6 Psychological Tricks to get People to Like You

Key Tips

  • Compliment what people are working on
  • Get people talking about what they love – Ask how do you like that? And What did you like about it?
  • Share a truth to your detriment
  • Body Language – keeping your body open
  • Exceed expectations
  • Be the first person to joke

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