We link our happiness to the fulfillment of our desires & expectations, only to raise the bar once we achieve what we desired. Contrary to our beliefs, do our desires & expectations serve as an obstacle (as compared to a key) to the happiness that we seek?
Advice from the Masters – Desires & Expectations
Our unfulfilled desires froth, ferment and layer up on the tranquil surface of our mind.When a desire is fulfilled, it gives you temporary joy and pleasure. The outcome is as ethereal and elusive as the desire itself.
Have you noticed how when our desires are not fulfilled, we feel low, broken, dejected, hurt and sometimes completely shattered? We work very hard so we may feed them but many more keep on arising. The moment you buy a car, you start looking at more expensive ones. As soon as you have a house, you start dreaming of a bigger one. This may not be wrong, but this does take us away from enjoying our lives in a more lasting and befitting manner.
It is not their pursuit that is burdensome. It is our belief that our desires must be fulfilled or that our happiness depends on the fulfillment of our desires.
Om Swami – Spiritual Monk, Author – If Truth Be Told / A Million Thoughts
‘Just a few miles more. A few miles more and you will be attaining the very ambition of your heart.’ And people go on chasing hallucinations, and life goes on slipping through their hands.
And a miracle happens: When you are standing out of the mind all the problems of the mind disappear, because mind itself disappears; it loses its grip over you.
Osho – Spiritual Teacher – Meditation: The 1st & Last Freedom / The Book of Secrets
Recommended Books on Managing Your Desires & Expectations
Videos – Desires & Expectations
Human’s can literally synthesise happiness (change our views when we don’t have a choice, so that we can feel better). This contrasts with our belief that happiness is linked to external things and getting things we want. As importantly, synthesised happiness is every bit as real as ‘real’ happiness (when you get what you want). Understand the secrets of how happiness is synthesised to be able to delink your happiness from external things and events.
Other concepts on Happiness
We have been programmed to seek ‘external approval’ for virtually everything that we do. Since everyone differs in the way that they view life, it becomes virtually impossible to please everyone all the time. People suffer through life in an endless pursuit of validation from other people and ‘keeping up with the Jones’, and in this mindless pursuit forget one simple question – what makes me happy?
We often place much greater importance to things, than they really deserve. By practicing the art of letting go, we gain a great degree of freedom from thoughts, emotions and things that prevent us from realizing our true selves.
Do more choices make us happier by helping us find the ‘perfect’ choice, or only leave us more confused. Understand why too many choices can lead to buyer paralysis and buyer remorse, and how when it comes to choices, less may in fact be more.
Most people are only grateful when things go their way, and lose out on the powerful positive benefits of gratitude. By being grateful, you shift your energy, which shifts your thinking, actions and ultimately your results. Gratitude is a state of mind, not dependent on your external circumstances.